CC Sabathia just became my favorite baseball player of all time.

Just to get up to speed, if you know anything about TFTB or the Two Beers Deep Podcast, I really don’t follow baseball at all. We literally have a segment called “Stickball With Greg” where I leave to do various Deke thing’s (bathroom, answering texts, taking shots to deal with Greg). I do want to say though that this CC Sabathia story has me ready to swing a stick at a ball.

Basically, the Yankees and the Rays were in the fifth inning or their game when CC hit the Rays catcher, Jake Sucre. Reason for the hit? The Rays pitcher Andrew Kittredge threw behind the head of the Yankees catcher Austin Romine. This pitch came after CC hit a Rays player in the hand, a pitch that was unintentional but still helped put both teams on edge. Three hits in total for this playing at home.

CC hit Sucre, walked off the field and looked at the Ray’s bench and uttered words that I’m not going to type just in case my mom reads this article. This move alone was pretty baller considering everything that had happened, but that’s not even close to the best part. I’d rate his walk off as the third coolest thing.

The best part of this entire situation. CC would do it again, meaning that he would again lose $500,000 for this hit. The reason it costs so much? CC was about to pitch into the seventh inning which would have activated a seventh inning plateau. Look, I’m not going to pretend to know what that means but I do know what $500,000 dollars is thanks to The Sims.

CC threw a pitch that cost him a solid ten years of working for the average American and did it with not a thought of regret in his head Now CC has made a large amount of money in his playing days and will live a great and luxurious life after baseball, but $500,000 is $500,000.

The second coolest moments of this entire spat was while the Rays bullpen emptied for some weird reason, pretending they were ready to brawl, Aaron Judge waltzed over in all of his 6’7” 282 pounds of glory, and basically stood in front of all the pitchers and seemed to just laugh. Aaron Judge should not be a baseball player. He’s too big despite the fact that he is an awesome baseball player.

Despite my odd relationship with baseball, I’d pay a decent chunk of money if these rivalries were always this entertaining. I’m not saying it needs to be an all out brawl every single time, but a little break in the break in the story line is all we’re asking for. Yeah, the game became longer, but I never complained about a long movie if I enjoyed the characters…and they threw balls at each other.

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